Where It All Began

Where It All Began

 

You may be wondering what exactly goes on in a typical day in the life of my Spectrum Kiddo.  I know he looks "neurotypical", but I'd like to start telling you about our journey starting with his very first day of Kindergarten many years ago.  I will probably post more blogs later with our different tales and stories.  Some are quite funny, but its way too much to type in ONE blog.

 

He was my "normal".  He was my first.  So I really didn't notice any signs nor did the Dr ever notice any signs.  He went to daycare and nobody there noticed anything unusual.  I just thought he was Quirky.  Like me. And brilliant.  He was speaking in clear intelligent sentences by 2yrs old and had a vast vocabulary.  He was also adding before he even started Kindergarten.  And I didn't teach him that.

 

Ok, so I was STOKED about Kindergarten.  I am one of those people who loves new school supplies and the smell of a fresh box of crayons.  Weird I know.  But I'm a nerd.  And my SK (Spectrum Kiddo) was so brilliant that I had visions of him amazing his teachers.  I knew they would love him and fast track him onto "Genius-hood".  Maybe all moms feel this way.  Lol.  I did not cry when I dropped him off to his first day.  Neither did he.  I was excited!  I had no idea what was in store for me over the years to come.

 

 

He got a referral his very first day of Kindergarten and spent half the day in the Principal's office.  Nobody called me during the day to tell me what was going on.  Apparently a few hours into the day, my SK had enough and wanted to go home.  So I was told that he started crying and screaming and rolling around in the floor.  He was begging to call me.  Thats all he wanted was to call his mommy. 

 

THey did not let him.  And he did not calm down.

 

Thus began our journey with this po-dunk country town school.  For the rest of the time he was there, the following things happened...

 

He got pops an average of 3 times a week. His teacher said she had been teaching for 20+ years and had NEVER had to give a child pops and had NEVER met a challenge like my SK.  When I suggested that he may be bored (ya know, cause he is brilliant and all), she stated that "there are plenty of other children in my class that are smarter than your son.  That is no excuse for bad behavior."  I calmly suggested that we could point fingers all day, but that we needed to find a solution and that I was sorry that she wasted her education on a job she was certainly not qualified for since she could not outsmart a 6 year old.

 

He got official "Write-Ups" for the following:

 

He refused to work.

He would not follow directions.

 

"Misbehaved" at lunch.

 

Disrespected adults.

 

Disruptive/yelling in class.

 

Slapped and pushed another student.

 

Slapped and pushed another student. (again)

 

Talking too much.

 

I got calls several times a week. 

 

Finally, the straw that broke my back was when I got a call from my Ex Mother-in-law (my SK's dad and I had divorced prior to him beginning KG).  She wanted to talk to me about the pops/write-up that my SK had received for that day.  I said, "What pops?" 

 

You see..... my dear blogger friends.... the school had called my ex mother-in-law about the incident INSTEAD of calling me, the custodial parent.  Oh I was hot and let them know that very same day.  Not long after that, I moved him to another school district since this one was only wanting to discipline him instead of trying to help me figure out why a kid who had previously had no behavioral incidents at daycare, was suddenly a hellion.

 

At the new school, the write-ups continued and I kept telling the school that I thought something was going on.  Something more than ADHD.  My Ex and the school just felt like it was a discipline problem.

 

In First Grade he got write-ups for hitting and kicking other students, refusal to complete work, disrespectful to adults, talking back, ignoring, playing in the bathroom.... He received several out of school suspensions this year.

 

His meltdowns continued in First Grade.  He would hide under the desks and refuse to come out.  He would curl up into a fetal position on the floor and rock with his hands over his ears.  He would kick and scream and throw himself on the floor and spin around in circles.  He had no friends and the kids did not want to play with him.  He preferred to play alone anyway and would walk the perimeter of the fence at recess by choice.  He wont stay still or sit in a chair correctly.  He always tried to put his feet up in the chair.  He is persistently busy with his hands, touching or tapping something.  He has a hard time with handwriting.  Its illegible.

 

This is the year that I got a call from the counselor.  She asked if everything was ok at home and if we needed any help paying the bills.  She said my SK's nose had started to bleed that day and when the nurse asked him why his nose was bleeding, he said that a bug flew up it last night when he was sleeping outside.  He told her that he slept outside now in a tent ever since the hurricane came because we had no power anymore.  He also told her that he had to hunt 'wild-game' in order for the family to eat.

 

The counselor said that as soon as he said 'wild game', she knew he was probably telling a tall tale, but she had to call and check on us regardless.

 

Its a very funny story and we all laughed about it then.  Thankfully, the Counselor had enough sense to check into the story instead of assuming something bad was going on.  CPS would have been called and that would have just added to my stress.

 

(FYI, his nose bled all the time because he picked it all the time and ended up scratching it with his long fingernails.)

 

So, can you see my confusion?  I was at a loss and couldn't answer them when they asked me WHY does your son do this?  I had no idea.  But I didn't think it was "normal."

 

Ok ok, so that's enough for now.  There is soooo much more I have to tell you, but I need to go.  This is a good start.